I'm back

"They told me to go away for a while, so I can get away from memories of you. How can I possibly explain to them that running away will do nothing, because no matter where I go, everything will remind me of you. I gave you the toolbox and told you to make a home of my body. And so you did. Pieces of you are implanted in my mind, you carved holes for warmth inside my bones and you sail within my blood. In my heart you made your bed, now it is just an empty room filled with memories of you. How can I run away from you, when I carry you inside me. For all that is left of me is a gallery of you and a museum of our used-to-be love."

Eindhoven, Netherlands

Stayed at aunty Oi Leng's place in Eindhoven last night which meant shopping, family time in a beautiful house, plenty of catching up on our European adventures followed by a nice night in front of the TV with everyone on their very comfy couch. Then there was this little cutiepie (pictured with poochjyu - the soft toy - or something) who gave me hugs - when he first saw me and before he went to bed :')

Talking about the crazy exciting lives the boys lead - ski camp and races, water polo camp, living in China, the States and Europe all before they're 15 - made me even more appreciative of the fact that we're all third culture kids and how that's something I'd never give up for the world.

9 more days

Lisbon, Portugal 

9 more days to home, as Nicole keeps reminding me - although whether she's looking forward to it or dreading it, I'm not too sure. 

Am perpetually jealous of all the humans off to exchange for Sem 2 now. After being so jaded from traveling and essentially becoming a packing expert (I hold record-breaking timings now), I miss the new sense of adventure that holds you as you step off that plane, into a new continent/country, as you breathe in that new, fresh/cold air, knowing that you have 5 months ahead of you in this newfound paradise with plenty of exciting days to come. 

Sometimes I forget how each sunset unfolds - but it's okay because then I just make up my own, and they're even more beautiful that way.

Settling

Currently just sitting on Nicole's bed as she groans about the lousy Internet connection getting in the way of her streaming some penguin movie, after having come back from a Thai dinner with the rest of the Maastricht humans, after a day of waking up, cooking, photo editing, shopping and snacking. Life's falling into a routine all over again and I love it. Especially because there aren't enough bikes for both Nicole and I so we're forced into taking night walks in the cold, cold winter to get home - which doesn't sound that bad really, 'cos it's actually pretty therapeutic. 

I guess Maastricht is one of those little towns you go to to retire, because your life falls into such a lovely (maybe boring) routine with the beautiful trees (with birds that shit on you - or your face), weather and complete with the convenience of having all the stores and supermarkets all in one place.  

This bugs me a little though:  on our way back from walking Jocelyn to the train station, we had:

1 x human yelling chingchonglinglong at us on the street

2 x men yelling shit at us while they were on their bikes

2 x men trying to throw something at us while they cycled past us

I mean, I get it. Racism does exist everywhere. Just because there are nice Dutch humans in Maas it doesn't mean that there won't be nice (?) racist ones. I'd thought we were all cultured and educated enough for this - but perhaps, not everyone's as lucky as we are to have been exposed to a mass of cultures since young. 

Too many thoughts

"That's how you know you love someone, I guess, when you can't experience anything without wishing the other person were there to see it, too"- Kaui Hart Hemmings, The Descendants

Finally back in Maastricht and ready to settle down for the next 3-4 days before I begin on the last few trips down to the Hague, Amsterdam, Eindhoven and London and then finally, finally, Singapore. 

Backpacking for 3 weeks is no joke. So many back aches, all that shifting from city to city, hostel to hostel, nights of bad sleep because I-don't-know-why, the fatigue that catches up real quick and the horrible fact that you can't settle down and call a place yours. But still, I've made plenty of good memories the past 3 weeks - things I wouldn't trade for the world. As time goes by, I start to amaze myself with the ridiculous thoughts that flow through my head and my ability to be increasingly independent. 

I think exchange has done me well.